Monday 19 August 2024

Jim's Subway 41: WHO invited YOU???

   Please except this gift from Mr Grey.

  You have served the Tailors well, Jim.  You are an asset to our cause!  Soon there will be peace again on the streets of Fenwick, and we will all benefit from the new order.  The success of your business with Mr King is astonishing, and I am proud to have you as a part of our ever growing enterprise.  May your luck never stop.


Signed.


Mr Twaddle aka Michael


The gift was a bottle of Mr Grey’s favourite non alcoholic wine.

  “Well I shan’t be drinking any of that,” Jim thought.  

  And he shelved the product somewhere in the corner of his house.

  That evening Jim sent out four invitations.

  He was going to celebrate his success.  

  He had many things to celebrate:

  One being his rise in status.  And then there was his nice new healthy bank balance.

  To round it off there was his recent triumph over his arch enemy DC Peddler - this victory made him feel very proud.  In the past Jim had always bowed his head to the bully, but this time had fought back and won!

  So yes indeed it was time to celebrate!

  And who better to celebrate a toast with than his four best friends in Fenwick?

  One by one the guests arrived.

  First on the scene was the renown Belgium hunter, Hugo Bergerac Devereux, or just Huey for short. 

  ‘I had to delay an expedition to the Congo for this,’ said the great hunter.  ‘But ah well, never mind!  Any excuse to see the inside of the Bankers House!  Lovely place…  You know my Great Great Great aunt helped build it?  But anyway, how are you sir Jim?’

  ‘I am rather well, Huey!  Better these days than in the old days,’ Jim replied, heartily.

  Jim was in a good mood and very happy to show it.  

  ‘Ah yes!  It is plainly visible by the new bright look about you!’ Huey responded.  ‘You have indeed won the world!  Ha!  When you arrived in Fenwick you were a mere dog in the streets.  And now here you are, richer than all of us put together.  Not that I am jealous, of course!  Money has very little meaning to a man like myself!  I am a man of the road.  I live for each and every single day.  I am never happier than when I am stalking the wilds of the Congo, with my gun at hand, and nought else but my wit and will to survive!’

  ‘Ah yes!  So how is all that business with the Congo going?  Have you been back to the place since last we met?  Have you found that dinosaur yet?’ said Jim.

  ‘It might be hard for you to believe Jim, but this time last week I was up to my ankles in mud,’ Huey replied.  ‘I was with my team, and we had penetrated the heart of the African interior.  We had crossed the great swamps of Agash Pinaghol, on the outer edge of Cameroon, within sight of Congo, where my quarry lies…  We made camp in the depths of the jungle, when we heard a terrifying sound!  It came from a great animal somewhere; a strange trumpet like sound it made.  My men ran in terror.  But I held my ground, of course, and drew out my gun and made ready to take my medicine.  I was not afraid to die!  

  ‘Just beyond the light of the camp I saw something large shuffle the tree branches, it made such a  stir!  And then it was gone… gone.  You know, Jim?  I am sure it was the dinosaur…  NO!  It WAS the Dinosaur!  My plan is to return to the Congo, forthwith, after this night is done, and I will put a bullet in the monsters head and bring it home as my prized trophy!’

  ‘Well good for you,’ said Jim, and he invited Huey in and led him to the dinning room.  ‘Help yourself to drinks,’ said Jim.

  Then the next guest arrived.

  It was Ted, the owner of the local bric-a-brac shop.

  ‘Well look at you Jim,’ said Ted upon arriving.  ‘Banker, hey?  How did you manage that?  I am Fenwick born and bred and have run my little shop all my life, and yet I have never gotten not one peep from beyond the castle walls.  And then up you pop and in a few weeks you're living in the Gate House!’

  ‘It’s just luck, that is all,’ Jim replied.

  ‘I wish I had even half of your kind of luck,’ Ted replied.  ‘Just a morsel, even…  You know I haven’t sold a single thing this past week?  This morning I made a special order for an old customer.  A silver saucepan.  They never turned up to collect it!  So there is me, poor old Ted out of pocket, again.  I spend more money on my customers than they do for me I swear!’

  ‘I imagine you do, but that is why you are such a lovely chap!’ Jim replied.  ‘Now please!  Forget about your woes for today.  Head on now to the dining room over there and join Huey.  O, and please help yourself to drinks!’

  Up next was Shaky Jones.

  ‘Just call us Shaky,’ he said as he walked in.  ‘That’s all I do these days anyway.  Shake and shake!  I would have brought my wife, but well, you know how it is, or how she is.  She doesn’t get about much these days - but o well, such is the lot of the dead!’

  ‘O yes!  Your wife.  She looked a little bony, if I remember?’ Jim replied.

  Shaky nodded his sad and weary head.  ‘Thank you for the invite,’ he said.  ‘It is not often I get out of my old shack to see the world.  I always wondered what it looked like inside the Bankers House, and well here I am!  Ha!  Now poor old me gets the chance to see how the other half live?  Nice one, Jim!  I am glad you consider me to be your friend!’

  ‘Please head o the dinning room now,’ said Jim.  ‘And, of course, help yourself to drinks!’

  Guest number four was a man who had been at war:

  It was Tipsy Neat hobbling in on one leg.

  ‘I brought drinks Mr Jim,’ he said.  ‘I have also got some cash somewhere, in my wallet if you give me chance to dig around I will find it.  It’s just, well, I want to pay my way.  And I want to pay you Jim, for being so kind and generous!’

  ‘No need for any of that!’ Jim replied.  ‘Please, Tipsy, you are my guest today!  Let me look after YOU for a change.  Hop your way over there to the dining room and help yourself to drinks!  Enjoy yourself for a change!’

  When the guests were assembled in the dinning room Jim joined them and made a speech:

  ‘You have a drinks at hand?  Good!  Now please listen to me!  When I stepped off the train for the first time in this town, I started to think about a lot of things.  What am I doing here?  I left my job and my home far behind.  But for some reason I did not regret my decision.  I liked this town.  I wanted to stay.  And so I did.  When I first arrived in Fenwick I was a beggar, and nothing more.  I had nothing.  NOTHING.  But you FOUR men here chose to be kind to me.  And I will never forget it.  NEVER.  Not to you, Tipsy and your generosity, and to Ted and your kindness, to Huey and his heart, and Shaky, well, just for being a good honest soul.  I respect you all.  I want us to drink and be merry tonight.  I am not what I was.  I am the Banker, now.  I have money and I have power.  And I am going to make all of our lives a lot better.  I remember my friends and I will look after them!’

  Hear!  Hear!

  Just then at that point there was a knock at the door!

  Who was that?

  Another guest?

  ‘Who else did you invite?’ said Huey.

  Jim was baffled and did not know what to say.

  He muffled something:

  ‘Bear with me!’ he replied.

  Jim headed to the front door.

  He opened it.

  Jim was going to scold whoever it as behind the door:

  ‘What do you want?  I am in the middle of a meeting…’

  When he saw who it was Jim stopped.  He felt like a soldier in the wars who had just felt his legs being shot away from under him.  All breath left his lungs…

  …In other words Jim could have collapsed!

  Because the man standing in the doorway was Butch!


(Remember!  All spelling errors and grammatical mistakes are intentional - the author 😆)


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