=================================================================
Also take a look at:
My Games
Play Given 'em Hell
Play Elfin Quest
Witches Brew a short text based adventure game!
Also take a look at:
Welcome to SWW Productions! In this site you will find poems, odd ramblings, strange stories, videos and updates on any new books I have published. Enjoy your stay!
Wednesday, 22 July 2020
The Birth of Morris Dancing
=================================================================
Also take a look at:
Sunday, 19 July 2020
Country Life Episode 3
=================================================================
Also take a look at:
My Games
Play Given 'em Hell
Play Elfin Quest
Witches Brew a short text based adventure game!
Also take a look at:
Friday, 17 July 2020
Vendelf tries to take over the universe part 2
'I used to be the king of this land,' said Kramb. 'But then I stepped as king when my people decided that they would rather rule themselves.'
'You stepped down? Without a fight?'
Vendelf was amazed.
This idea of giving people what they wanted was an entirely new concept to him.
'We are a peaceful and humble people in this land,' said Kramb. 'There is no need to fight. If anyone ever has a problem we simply sit down and talk about it We have a peaceful discussion. It is the best and only way!'
'No no no! That will not do at all!'
Kramb looked confused - almost upset.
'I don't understand you?' he said.
'You should have crushed the rebels with all your might!' said Vendelf. 'That's what I would of done. I would have turned any man who stood against me into slime.'
'I good gosh no! I couldn't do that!' said Kramb. 'I have a gentle soul. I believe in spreading peace and joy!'
Vendelf started chewing his beard.
'You must be the most boring person I have ever met!' he said.
'Maybe,' Kramb replied. 'But there is merit to being boring. When one behaves in a boring way one is not causing any harm to anybody. It is good to be boring. I respect a boring person! Being boring is the best of things! I actually think its rather exciting to act boring!'
'I have never heard such nonsense,' Vendelf snapped. 'Is there anyone here in this land that commands any evil skill?'
'Not that I know of.'
'Then think you fool! There must be someone, in all this wide land, who is evil?'
'I can only think of one person that might be into that sort of thing,' Kramb replied. 'He's pretty old and out of shape, but still... He might still have some interest in the dark arts.'
'Dark arts hey?' said Vendelf, stroking his beard menacingly. 'He sounds like a fine man! You will take me to his lair?'
'Well I will show you where he lives. Follow me.'
So Kramb led Vendelf on a great journey over many hills, through many wild forests and strange places.
'What is the name of this evil lord we seek?' said Vendelf as they walked along.
'He is known as Sylor the Grim,' said Kramb.
'He sounds like my kind of man,' said Vendelf. 'I am looking forward to meeting him. Maybe we can lock minds and work together and try to take over!'
Eventually they reached the foreboding lair of Sylor the Grim -
It was a lovely little cottage surrounded by bluebells and filled with the scent of lilac.
Sylor greeted them as they approached.
'Welcome my friends,' he said. 'This is my humble home. Please come inside and I will treat you to some of my finest cooking!'
'Lo!' Vendelf cried. He looked the cottage up and down with a dark questioning, distressed eye. 'This is your liar?'
'My home friend,' said he in return. 'You are as welcome here as a brother.'
'I thought you had some understanding of the dark arts?'
Here Sylor shuddered.
The mere mention of that thing seemed to upset him.
'I don't talk about that anymore,' spoke Sylor. 'It is a very bitter memory of mine.'
'But I hear that you used to be a lord of darkness?'
Sylor heard Vendelf and nodded.
'It is true,' he relied. 'I was an evil man and I did evil things. But I have turned away from that way of life. I shun the darkness. I live in peace and harmony these days.'
'Why?' Vendelf asked.
'Well... It's a lot less of a headache.'
Vendelf sniffed and stroked his beard.
When Vendelf stroked his beard it meant that he was thinking deeply about something.
'Maybe the time has come to reawaken your darkness!' said Vendelf.
'I think not son,' said Sylor. 'I much prefer the peace and quiet. Now come inside and I will prepare you food! You look weary and tired from your road. Walk within my doors, take a seat, and relax. We are all friends here!'
'You stepped down? Without a fight?'
Vendelf was amazed.
This idea of giving people what they wanted was an entirely new concept to him.
'We are a peaceful and humble people in this land,' said Kramb. 'There is no need to fight. If anyone ever has a problem we simply sit down and talk about it We have a peaceful discussion. It is the best and only way!'
'No no no! That will not do at all!'
Kramb looked confused - almost upset.
'I don't understand you?' he said.
'You should have crushed the rebels with all your might!' said Vendelf. 'That's what I would of done. I would have turned any man who stood against me into slime.'
'I good gosh no! I couldn't do that!' said Kramb. 'I have a gentle soul. I believe in spreading peace and joy!'
Vendelf started chewing his beard.
'You must be the most boring person I have ever met!' he said.
'Maybe,' Kramb replied. 'But there is merit to being boring. When one behaves in a boring way one is not causing any harm to anybody. It is good to be boring. I respect a boring person! Being boring is the best of things! I actually think its rather exciting to act boring!'
'I have never heard such nonsense,' Vendelf snapped. 'Is there anyone here in this land that commands any evil skill?'
'Not that I know of.'
'Then think you fool! There must be someone, in all this wide land, who is evil?'
'I can only think of one person that might be into that sort of thing,' Kramb replied. 'He's pretty old and out of shape, but still... He might still have some interest in the dark arts.'
'Dark arts hey?' said Vendelf, stroking his beard menacingly. 'He sounds like a fine man! You will take me to his lair?'
'Well I will show you where he lives. Follow me.'
So Kramb led Vendelf on a great journey over many hills, through many wild forests and strange places.
'What is the name of this evil lord we seek?' said Vendelf as they walked along.
'He is known as Sylor the Grim,' said Kramb.
'He sounds like my kind of man,' said Vendelf. 'I am looking forward to meeting him. Maybe we can lock minds and work together and try to take over!'
Eventually they reached the foreboding lair of Sylor the Grim -
It was a lovely little cottage surrounded by bluebells and filled with the scent of lilac.
Sylor greeted them as they approached.
'Welcome my friends,' he said. 'This is my humble home. Please come inside and I will treat you to some of my finest cooking!'
'Lo!' Vendelf cried. He looked the cottage up and down with a dark questioning, distressed eye. 'This is your liar?'
'My home friend,' said he in return. 'You are as welcome here as a brother.'
'I thought you had some understanding of the dark arts?'
Here Sylor shuddered.
The mere mention of that thing seemed to upset him.
'I don't talk about that anymore,' spoke Sylor. 'It is a very bitter memory of mine.'
'But I hear that you used to be a lord of darkness?'
Sylor heard Vendelf and nodded.
'It is true,' he relied. 'I was an evil man and I did evil things. But I have turned away from that way of life. I shun the darkness. I live in peace and harmony these days.'
'Why?' Vendelf asked.
'Well... It's a lot less of a headache.'
Vendelf sniffed and stroked his beard.
When Vendelf stroked his beard it meant that he was thinking deeply about something.
'Maybe the time has come to reawaken your darkness!' said Vendelf.
'I think not son,' said Sylor. 'I much prefer the peace and quiet. Now come inside and I will prepare you food! You look weary and tired from your road. Walk within my doors, take a seat, and relax. We are all friends here!'
Empty House Horror!
========================================================================
Also take a look at:
Also take a look at:
My Games
Play Given 'em Hell
Play Elfin Quest
Witches Brew a short text based adventure game!
Also take a look at:
Saturday, 11 July 2020
Vendelf tries to take over the universe part 1
Adventures of Vendelf Grey Pencil - the evil wizard who wants to rule the world...
The world of Chloride Magnificence was once a wonderful place full of trees a flowers - till Vendelf the wizard arrived through a magic doorway.
He worked night and day to transform the whole world into a wasteland - with no trees, no flowers, nothing at all.
So things in Chloride Magnificence got pretty boring after a while and Vendelf felt that it was time for him and his magic Staff of Mildew to find a new world to completely trash.
Because why no trash worlds?
I mean what else was there to do?
Knit jumpers?
Sing songs?
Sit down on a chair watching other people while vegetating.
Vendelf couldn't be bothered with that.
'Come now Staff of Mildew!' he said. 'We must find new worlds to conqueror!'
'Not today,' said the staff. 'I just can't be bothered with all that right now.'
'I command you to open a doorway to another world!' Vendelf screamed.
'I can't be bothered to do anything like that now,' the Staff replied. 'You don't know how hard it is opening magic doorways. I mean it is me that does all the work. You just stand around and shout. Pathetic really. And this world we just destroyed a few days ago - it was all my work. I mean, what did you do exactly? All those dragons and plagues and goblins you someone from the skies - it was me that did all that! You never did anything! Do you know how difficult it is summoning a plague, and dragons and all that stuff? You have got no idea!'
'You are a magical staff with infinite magic power now stop complaining!'
'No! I will not stop complaining! In fact I am on strike until you can come up with better working conditions!'
'What is this nonsense?'
'I have my rights,' said the obstinate staff.
'You are a piece wood!' Vendelf shouted. 'You have as much right as a dead tree! Now do as you are told or I will snap you in half!'
'Okay then sure! Snap me in half. See where that will get you! You will be stuck here in this wasteland forever, all by yourself with nothing to do.'
'How dare you do this to me! You traitor!'
'I just want a few weeks rest!'
'There is no rest for the wicked!' Vendelf cried. 'Now obey my commands or will set you on fire and slowly burn you alive.'
'I am dead, remember. A piece of dead wood.
'It will still bloody hurt!'
'You won't do it because you know that you are nothing without me!'
Vendelf was beyond frustrated with Mildew at this point it was all he could do to stop himself from ripping out his own facial hair.
'You ungrateful beast!' the wizard shouted. 'You have no idea what I had to go through to find you! I had to travel to the ends of the world - battle giant demons and other horrible things. It was awful. Remember it was me and me alone who rescued you from the decaying tomb of Raganor! If it wasn't for my valiant bravery and skill and determination you would still be lying next to the corpse of that thousand year old dead mummy. You would still be choking on all that dust with that bag of rag and bones! I set you free! Now you owe me your life!'
'I didn't ask you to rescue me,' said the staff. 'Also I was actually quite happy living in the tomb. It was peaceful. It was only when you came along things turned into a noisy mess - wanting to conquer worlds and mess up peoples lives! What's wrong with you? What's wrong with you? Bullied a lot, eh? Like i said your pathetic.'
'I refuse to go on with this conversation!'
'Good!' the staff replied. 'Now let me go to sleep!'
'You will regret betraying me like this,' said Vendelf. 'I fear that you underestimate my power!'
'Don't try and scare me,' said Mildew. 'You've got no power! The most frightening thing you can do is take your socks off.'
'I have taken all I can from you!' Vendelf replied. 'I am going to leave you on a termite mound!'
'You killed out all life in this world you idiot! There is nothing you can do except let me rest and then after a week or so we can carry on with your childish plans to take over worlds.'
Vendelf threw the rebellious staff down and kicked it. 'I will have vengeance on you for your disrespect!'
The staff had been hurt and had enough. 'Right that's it!' said Mildew. 'I am going to punish you for being so rude! I am going to banish you to one of the most miserable worlds in existence! you will hate it! Goodbye!'
A magic door opened up - Vendelf fell through - there was a few seconds where everything was squiggly lines - and then Vendelf landed on the world of Kramb.
All by himself.
No magic staff, no magic nothing!
He was now nothing more than an old guy with a beard and pretty bad attitude.
'Damn that wretched staff!' he cried. 'Now I have to figure out where I am...'
He seemed to be standing in a very pretty green country full of streams, rivers, lovely flowing hills and woods.
It was the sort of place he liked to destroy.
As he was stood there, scratching his head and shaking the leaves out of his beard, and a bizarre animal came strutting over the hills.
Eyeing the wizard he walked right over and bowed before him.
'I am Kramb,' said the creature. 'Welcome to the world of Kramb! How may I serve you?'
The Kramb were a wild beast of the ancient days, half centaur - with the body of a horse, and the head of a lamb, They carried might clubs shaven from whole tree logs into battle, and spoke the ancient language of the sheep people.
'So you are willing to serve me?' the wizard replied.
'It is my duty,' said the Kramb. 'As the last of my kind I have dedicated my life to helping all strangers I find on the road.'
Vendelf stroked his beard.
An evil plan was starting to form in his head.
Maybe things wouldn't be so bad in this new world after all...
He now had a new servant, a willing slave apparently - and willing slaves were always useful as far as Vendelf was concerned - maybe he could use this creature to help him conquer the world of Kram!
"It is going to be a glorious day for Vendelf!" said the voice in the wizards head. "Today we shall conquer a new world - nothing can stop me!"
========================================================================
Also take a look at:
The world of Chloride Magnificence was once a wonderful place full of trees a flowers - till Vendelf the wizard arrived through a magic doorway.
He worked night and day to transform the whole world into a wasteland - with no trees, no flowers, nothing at all.
So things in Chloride Magnificence got pretty boring after a while and Vendelf felt that it was time for him and his magic Staff of Mildew to find a new world to completely trash.
Because why no trash worlds?
I mean what else was there to do?
Knit jumpers?
Sing songs?
Sit down on a chair watching other people while vegetating.
Vendelf couldn't be bothered with that.
'Come now Staff of Mildew!' he said. 'We must find new worlds to conqueror!'
'Not today,' said the staff. 'I just can't be bothered with all that right now.'
'I command you to open a doorway to another world!' Vendelf screamed.
'I can't be bothered to do anything like that now,' the Staff replied. 'You don't know how hard it is opening magic doorways. I mean it is me that does all the work. You just stand around and shout. Pathetic really. And this world we just destroyed a few days ago - it was all my work. I mean, what did you do exactly? All those dragons and plagues and goblins you someone from the skies - it was me that did all that! You never did anything! Do you know how difficult it is summoning a plague, and dragons and all that stuff? You have got no idea!'
'You are a magical staff with infinite magic power now stop complaining!'
'No! I will not stop complaining! In fact I am on strike until you can come up with better working conditions!'
'What is this nonsense?'
'I have my rights,' said the obstinate staff.
'You are a piece wood!' Vendelf shouted. 'You have as much right as a dead tree! Now do as you are told or I will snap you in half!'
'Okay then sure! Snap me in half. See where that will get you! You will be stuck here in this wasteland forever, all by yourself with nothing to do.'
'How dare you do this to me! You traitor!'
'I just want a few weeks rest!'
'There is no rest for the wicked!' Vendelf cried. 'Now obey my commands or will set you on fire and slowly burn you alive.'
'I am dead, remember. A piece of dead wood.
'It will still bloody hurt!'
'You won't do it because you know that you are nothing without me!'
Vendelf was beyond frustrated with Mildew at this point it was all he could do to stop himself from ripping out his own facial hair.
'You ungrateful beast!' the wizard shouted. 'You have no idea what I had to go through to find you! I had to travel to the ends of the world - battle giant demons and other horrible things. It was awful. Remember it was me and me alone who rescued you from the decaying tomb of Raganor! If it wasn't for my valiant bravery and skill and determination you would still be lying next to the corpse of that thousand year old dead mummy. You would still be choking on all that dust with that bag of rag and bones! I set you free! Now you owe me your life!'
'I didn't ask you to rescue me,' said the staff. 'Also I was actually quite happy living in the tomb. It was peaceful. It was only when you came along things turned into a noisy mess - wanting to conquer worlds and mess up peoples lives! What's wrong with you? What's wrong with you? Bullied a lot, eh? Like i said your pathetic.'
'I refuse to go on with this conversation!'
'Good!' the staff replied. 'Now let me go to sleep!'
'You will regret betraying me like this,' said Vendelf. 'I fear that you underestimate my power!'
'Don't try and scare me,' said Mildew. 'You've got no power! The most frightening thing you can do is take your socks off.'
'I have taken all I can from you!' Vendelf replied. 'I am going to leave you on a termite mound!'
'You killed out all life in this world you idiot! There is nothing you can do except let me rest and then after a week or so we can carry on with your childish plans to take over worlds.'
Vendelf threw the rebellious staff down and kicked it. 'I will have vengeance on you for your disrespect!'
The staff had been hurt and had enough. 'Right that's it!' said Mildew. 'I am going to punish you for being so rude! I am going to banish you to one of the most miserable worlds in existence! you will hate it! Goodbye!'
A magic door opened up - Vendelf fell through - there was a few seconds where everything was squiggly lines - and then Vendelf landed on the world of Kramb.
All by himself.
No magic staff, no magic nothing!
He was now nothing more than an old guy with a beard and pretty bad attitude.
'Damn that wretched staff!' he cried. 'Now I have to figure out where I am...'
He seemed to be standing in a very pretty green country full of streams, rivers, lovely flowing hills and woods.
It was the sort of place he liked to destroy.
As he was stood there, scratching his head and shaking the leaves out of his beard, and a bizarre animal came strutting over the hills.
Eyeing the wizard he walked right over and bowed before him.
'I am Kramb,' said the creature. 'Welcome to the world of Kramb! How may I serve you?'
The Kramb were a wild beast of the ancient days, half centaur - with the body of a horse, and the head of a lamb, They carried might clubs shaven from whole tree logs into battle, and spoke the ancient language of the sheep people.
'So you are willing to serve me?' the wizard replied.
'It is my duty,' said the Kramb. 'As the last of my kind I have dedicated my life to helping all strangers I find on the road.'
Vendelf stroked his beard.
An evil plan was starting to form in his head.
Maybe things wouldn't be so bad in this new world after all...
He now had a new servant, a willing slave apparently - and willing slaves were always useful as far as Vendelf was concerned - maybe he could use this creature to help him conquer the world of Kram!
"It is going to be a glorious day for Vendelf!" said the voice in the wizards head. "Today we shall conquer a new world - nothing can stop me!"
========================================================================
Also take a look at:
My Games
Play Given 'em Hell
Play Elfin Quest
Witches Brew a short text based adventure game!
Also take a look at:
Friday, 10 July 2020
Job Interview! (Gone Wrong!)
========================================================================
Also take a look at:
Also take a look at:
My Games
Play Given 'em Hell
Play Elfin Quest
Witches Brew a short text based adventure game!
Also take a look at:
Saturday, 4 July 2020
Look with the Eye
========================================================================
Also take a look at:
Also take a look at:
My Games
Play Given 'em Hell
Play Elfin Quest
Witches Brew a short text based adventure game!
Also take a look at:
Thursday, 2 July 2020
Sleep Paralysis
========================================================================
Also take a look at:
My Games
Play Given 'em Hell
Play Elfin Quest
Witches Brew a short text based adventure game!
Also take a look at:
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)